This past Sunday, as I was sitting in the sun and enjoying the warmth, I was thinking about the upcoming Colorado Summer days and the joy it brings me knowing that it's just around the corner. I was looking toward my house as I was deep into my Summertime trance when that one area by the front door caught my eye. My sweet meditation was interrupted by fear and panic. OH NO!!!! THEY'RE COMING SOON!! I'm not prepared....I AM NOT PREPARED!

It's an annual battle that I regret to say I lose every year. It's the battle of the birds.

The first year we were in the house they made their home on top of the outdoor lamp located next to the front door. My entire family were fascinated by this bird family and we were able to watch the progress of the chicks each day as we peeked out the kitchen window. We had a front row seat as the parent birds flew in to feed them and we watched these little beeks pop up from the nest for their breakfast/lunch/dinner. We watched them grow into toddlers, not able to fly yet, and sitting in the nest taking in the view around them. Then, we were there when they made their first attempts at flight with their parents nearby to assist and protect them. Ah, the joy of life. That was fun.

What's not fun is the mess and the nuisance. While they're nesting on my lamp, they're also protecting. A simple walk out of my front door creates chaos as the dive-bombing parents protect their brood. I'm flailing my arms to protect myself while yelling at them at the same time: "Damn it! I just want to water my lawn!" There is one mother-in-law likes to come into the house through the front door. I'm not gonna lie....that is FUN to watch.

Then there's the mess. These birds to not have diapers. While I respect the ability to unload at will and with no regard, it's not a pleasant scene located right next to my "Welcome" doormat. I won't even get into the odor this Colorado wildlife scene creates.


If you've been to Mt. Rushmore more than once, perhaps you'll agree that the first time was really cool. The second time, well, you've seen it. Less spectacular. I feel the same way about these birds. It less exciting every year. I'm not looking to hurt anyone or anything, I just want them to find a new home. I've tried a variety of things including sticking nails through a beverage coozie. Nope. They found a work-around. I was equally angry and impressed. Here's my ingenious coozienail invention:


Make no mistake, I am dreading their arrival. They have kicked my butt, buzzed my head, pooped on my house, and have mocked me every single year while living rent free.

I need a win! If you have any ideas that are simple and safe for friends and fowl, I'd love to know.